Daughter refuses to let her mother move in with her because she’s tired of living with her other daughter in the family home: ‘She's tired of all of us’

Giuliana Tiscioni • Writer

Aug 1, 2026 5:15 PM EDT

How hard is it for family to understand that they need to respect boundaries? Apparently, very hard.

Sometimes our own families are the ones who think that boundaries don't apply to them. They love us, and we love them, but love doesn't mean indefinite access to our house, our belongings, or permission to stomp emotionally over us. Oftentimes we let them say and do whatever they want to avoid conflict with them and other family members. But they can go overboard pretty easily and hurt us while we try to protect them.

At some point, we have to choose our own peace of mind and let them handle themselves however they can, especially if they are our older relatives. Parents, aunts, and uncles had already lived their lives by the time the younger generation of sons, daughters, nieces, and nephews was born. Is not their responsibility to take charge or fix the elder's lives or mistakes.

In no way does this imply that all family should be cut off or ignored. After all, family is our first safety net. It means that we have to take care of our mental and emotional health before complying with everybody else's demands.

A mother happened to get offended over a daughter setting a clear boundary that she didn't like. The daughter shared on Reddit that she's the first one of her siblings to be able to buy a house. Her older brothers rent, and her sister lives with her mother. The mother, however, seems to have had enough of the sister, the family, and the house, so she wants to sell and move away. So far, so good. Until she asked her daughter to move in with her. The daughter said no, since her mother already has a house and doesn't really want to be around the rest of her family. The mother got really upset, called her daughter ungrateful, and accused her of not loving her.

Her request seems a little ironic. After all, if she's tired of living with one daughter, why would she want to live with the other one? And accusing her of not loving her is quite the manipulative move. She doesn't sound like an easy person to be around, and maybe the rest of her children had their reasons to move away.

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AITAH for telling my mother she can't move in with me when she has her own house?

I'm having some issues with my mother and I thought I post here to get a sanity check. I'm 31, single and I live alone since I was 19, so far renting small apartments made for single

people. My mother lives in our family home with my sister (my sister is an adult, she's working but wants to save on rent). The house is fully paid, not rented.

Cheezburger Image 10652564992 — *Mother and her young adult daughter.*
*_{Subjects are models.}*

In the last couple of years, there's been some occasions when there's arguments in the family, my mother says that "she's tired of all of us" and that she wants to sell the house and

go live somewhere else, which to us doesn't seem like a good idea knowing that the money she sells the house for may not cover another house alone.

The first and most important issue I have right now: I got the chance of buying my own house, and the moment my mother found out about this she started saying that she will

Cheezburger Image 10652565504 — *A woman getting the keys to her new house.*
*_{Image is a recreation.}*

move in with me. I had to tell her that I want to live alone, and that won't let her move in with me because she feels like it and not out of necessity. This, to no one's surprise, caused a

big argument that ended with her yelling at me that I don't love her and that I'm ungrateful.

Second issue: I am not the older sibling. I have two older brothers that already have their own lives. You could say that their personal economy is not as stable as mine, and they are

still renting, even with family of their own. To me, I feel like my mother is "window shopping" to see with which one of her kids she will be more comfortable, and I don't think that's fair.

So basically, AITAH for telling my mother she can't move in with me when she has her own house?

Cheezburger Image 10652565248 — *Family house the mother wants to sell.*
*_{Image is stock.}*

mynamesnotcarter Hold on to your boundary, show her other ways you love her or will be there for her, but don't let her move in even for "a few months". NTA

Explanation_Lopsided NTA. It doesn't sound like your mother is going to listen to reason. She wants her way and is going to yell at you and call you ungrateful if you don't do what she wants. Is there any way you can just tell her that the house purchase fell through and then secretly buy it on your own?

Kitchen_Trifle_8382 It sounds like your mom has too much free time. Why does she need to live with any of her adult children? The whole point of becoming an adult is living separately from parents. Your mom needs to find some hobbies that fully occupy her. Can you suggest some activities she might enjoy?

rasalscan NTA. It's good you are setting clear boundaries on your home. I would suggest though, if she wants to sell her house and have her own place, she should. All her children are grown and it sounds like she is s ck of the family home. I'd be supporting her independence.

username 0000 NTA ungrateful for what? She's not your child, she owns her own house. You moved out at 19. You don't want to live with a parent who instantly goes to "ungrateful" and "you don't love me" when they don't get their way.

Mera 1506 NTA. That said the moment your sister leaves the house may be to much too maintain for her alone. So keep in mind selling the house can happen within the next couple of years.

But yeah the irony is thick with this one. The woman who says she's tired of everyone is trying to move in with the people she's tired of? The math ain't mathing.

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Daughter refuses to let her mother move in with her because she’s tired of living with her other daughter in the family home: ‘She's tired of all of us’

How hard is it for family to understand that they need to respect boundaries? Apparently, very hard.

AITAH for telling my mother she can't move in with me when she has her own house?

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